It’s been 7 years since I ran my last half marathon and 5 years ago that my husband had his debilitating stroke that left him disabled and homebound. Since then it’s been a litany of other health episodes with several hospitalizations. There were more strokes, cancer, pulmonary embolisms, heart attack, serious eye issues requiring multiple and long surgeries too. In the midst of all of that, I kind of lost myself. It became all about him and his needs. I put on a lot of weight and now to add insult to injury, he is showing signs (personality and behavior changes) that are indications of dementia. I have no idea what each day will bring. I think I hit my lowest low over a week ago. I love him so much but he is almost like a stranger to me. We’ve been married 35 years and the unbelievable grief of knowing he will never be the same, is overwhelming.
So following the lowest point in my life, I picked myself up and joined the gym. Every morning now I have been doing 30 minutes on the elliptical and 25 on the bicycle. I feel really good. My hope is to lose 30 pounds by mid February and another 20 by late April. Each morning when I go into the gym, I go with God. I pray as I work out and I offer up my work out as a prayer.
I also am on a 1200 calorie diet with a lot of water through the day. I have gone back to eating more chicken and fish.
The big news is that I also signed up for this half marathon in April.
The only thing I can control through the day is my work out and diet. Therefore, I am going to rebuild myself step by step, using the grief and frustration/fear as the fuel for my journey, propelling me to a greater “come back” of spiritual, mental and physical good health.
Make today count and follow my journey…